Tele-shower

Thank goodness my mom had the good sense to wait until Thursday to tell me that a surprise baby shower had been planned for me in Syracuse. I'm not sure how I would've handled the news if she had told me on Monday or Tuesday. I was sad that I couldn't be there for it and I touched that people cared so much, which made me even sadder. The good news is that I could still kind of be there. My computer-savvy brother, Dan, helped me set up a webcam on my computer so I was able watch and interact with everyone at the shower this morning. I was a little nervous. I thought it might be awkward and a uncomfortable, but it wasn't. I was sad that I couldn't jump through the computer screen and be there, but it was cool to be able to see everyone and thank them for their generous gifts.

I'm interested in seeing any photos that I'm in - Mom? Brittney? I really hope it looks very Max Headroom.

Syracuse 2006

Sweet memories of the New York State fair...and my waist...

Grounded

I have been looking forward to my trip home to Syracuse for months. My mom bought me the ticket as my birthday present. It was planned so perfectly - Brandon would go to Missouri to see his family the same week. I was to leave this Friday, right after the madness of June had ended and right before I was too far along to fly. I always look forward to going home, but this trip was different. It would be the last time in a long time I would go home alone. I would have my mom all to myself. I miss her so much. And I had so much planned: I couldn't wait to pick out fabric for Sunny's quilt. My brother and his family would be there that first weekend, I would see my friend Brittney, go to Wegmans at least four times, eat a coffee sundae at Friendly's, eat a coney, watch the 4th of July parade in Manlius, swim in my mom's pool and just relax.

Then Sunday happened. I was surfing around the internet looking for more information about my placenta previa when there it was: women with placenta previa should not fly on airplanes. I was shocked. It was everywhere I looked, even my pregnancy book. I pretty much lost it instantly. I knew what my doctor would say and when I spoke to her and the next morning she said it: "no airplanes". She wants me on the ground at all times, close to a hospital. She said that it would be extremely dangerous if I started to bleed on the plane because no one would be able to help me. Okay, yes that made sense, but I was still confused and angry. Why did I have to find this out in the internet? Why didn't she tell me as soon as she diagnosed me? The way she explained it (and Brandon was there, so he will back me up on this) was that this condition would only be an issue when I was much closer to my due date. I like my OB and I appreciate her concern, but I'm still kind of pissed off.

So, my trip has been canceled and to say that I am devastated would be the understatement of the year. I didn't go to work yesterday, instead I stayed at home and cried a lot. Today I managed to go to work and only cried twice, so I think I'm coming to terms with it all. I realized something pretty profound last night that's been getting me through: shit happens. This is no one's fault. Maybe the angels are watching over me protecting Sunny and me from danger. Maybe there is a reason this happened. I sure hope so because right now it sucks. But I know it could be a hell of a lot worse. And I do have a consolation prize: my mom has decided that since I can't come to her, she will come to me. This means that Brandon can go to Missouri to see his family and I won't be alone missing him and feeling sorry for myself. AND this means that I get to see my mommy, which is all I really wanted anyway. And I'm hoping she brings coneys. And split top hot dog buns. And Hoffman's mustard. What? I'm hungry.

A Virgo? A Leo?

Brandon and I had our monthly OB appointment this past Thursday. The good news is that Sunny is looking great! My doctor was happy with her size. It was fun to see how big she's gotten. Right now she's in a "jack knife" position with her head down. Her feet and hands are in the same area at times, so that's why I feel so much activity in that one spot.

The not so good news is that I still have placenta previa. Though my placenta has moved a little bit, it's still covering my cervix and my doctor doesn't think it's going to move enough for me to give birth vaginally. Blarg. I have an appointment with our fetal doctor in five weeks (when I'm 32 weeks) to see exactly where the placenta is. If he tells us that it's moved and is no longer covering the cervix, then hurray! Vaginal birth! If he tells us that it hasn't moved, the next step would then be to have an amniocentesis at the hospital at 35 weeks to determine if Sunny's lungs have developed enough for her to be okay outside the womb. If her lungs look good, I will have a c-section the following day. If not, we will wait a bit. This would all be for good reason - if I still have placenta previa that late in my pregnancy, it would be extremely dangerous for me to go into labor and give birth vaginally. Both Sunny and I would be in danger of hemorrhaging if the cervix opens at all.

I was upset for a couple days after learning all of this, but for all we know my placenta will move and a c-section won't be necessary. And if it is necessary, then I will accept as what's best for Sunny. I am already so in love with her and I will do anything and everything to keep her safe. In the wise words of my OB: "we don't want to dick around."

I'm melting

So much to say, but so little stamina to say it. It is way too freaking hot out right now. It's 7:30pm and it's over 100 degrees outside. How wrong is that? I've already taken two cold baths in the past four hours. It's ice cream time soon, thank goodness.

I have lots of stories to tell and a baby update, but they will have to wait until it gets cooler out. Back to the air conditioning...

The best photo ever?

I cannot properly express how endlessly happy this photo makes me. I love that one of my favorite people in the world, Derek, is in it with me and I love that it looks staged. We've decided that it looks like one of those photos you can have done at Universal Studios called "See Yourself on the Red Carpet!" I chose a clipboard and credential as props, Derek chose the clipboard and headset prop and we posed. I'm pretending to look really professional and Derek just looks really, really happy to be there. In reality, we are working - I'm talking to someone on the other side of Warren and Annette, Derek is stopping the flow of people from crossing between them and the photographers. Neither of us had any idea the photo was being taken until Derek found it the next day. Oh, how I love you, Getty photographer.

I'm too tired to think of a clever title

I knew June would be a busy month, but wow. This week is especially nuts. Brandon and I are both swamped at work. Brandon has a board due Friday and I've been working on AFI's Life Achievement Award ceremony, which is tomorrow. I'm not sure how I'm going to survive being on my feet all day tomorrow, but it will be my last event for a while so the pain will be worth it. This weekend will be completely dedicated to packing as we're moving on Tuesday. I can't believe we'll be out of here in less than a week. My brain doesn't have room to comprehend it all. I'm not even sure if we've told the cats. They certainly do enjoy the boxes, though.

Sunny goes to her second Dodger game

Remember how I mentioned before that I have the best boss ever? Well, here's more proof: my boss won two tickets to a Dodger game and gave them to me. These weren't just regular tickets, mind you - these were Dodger Dugout tickets worth $500 each! They came with free parking and free food! AND our seats were four rows behind the Dodger dugout. We went on Saturday and had a freaking blast. The Dodgers won!

I was expecting free Dodger Dogs and nachos, but this was so much better. Fancy!


Of course I had a sausage sandwich. And grilled veggies. And fruit. And a root beer.


This was the view from our seats.


So close!


I think Nomar is in love with us.

25 1/2 weeks (almost six months)

My mom was disappointed that I wasn't smiling in my last belly photos, so this is for you, Mama.

Birthday!

Thursday was my birthday! I had a great day and felt very loved. Everyone in my family called me and Laura and JA, too. Brandon had the biggest and most beautiful flower arrangement I have ever seen sent to me at work. People stopped and gawked whenever they walked by my office. My boss said it was like no one had ever seen flowers before. And speaking of my boss, she gave me orchids and chocolates and took me out for lunch. Best boss ever.

I can't lie, though - the whole day was not perfect. After work I had to race home to get dressed for dinner. I left my office, walked out to my car and stopped. Holy crap. The car next to mine was parked so close that there was no way I was going to be able to fit my body - pregnant or not - in between. Are you freaking kidding me? Oh, I was pissed. I turned around and started walking back into the building to find the owner of the car, but then I started to feel guilty. As a pregnant lady I didn't feel that I had to remedy this on my own. There was no way in hell I was going to attempt to climb from the passenger side over to the driver's seat...or was there? I can fix this! I don't deserve special treatment! I'm still nimble! And then I learned something - I was very wrong. As I attempted to lift my body from the passenger seat it felt like a magnet was pulling me down. I literally could not lift my body up more than a couple inches. It was bizarre and sad and I felt completely helpless. In the end, it took two people and four telephone numbers to reach this guy. I wanted to punch him in the moneybags when I saw him, but I could tell he felt bad. Instead I said "Are you trying to prove to me that I'm fat?" Poor guy. I feel bad about that now, but I didn't know what else to say. And I'm a smart ass. I don't know if you and I have met.

Thankfully, the day ended on a high note. Brandon and I had dinner with Molly and Owen at Angelini Osteria. The dinner was awesome and the company was even better. This weird guy showed up at the end of dinner. I have no idea who it was, but I found him to be very attractive.

Wardrobe Expansion

I am not ashamed to admit that I like looking cute - now more than ever. Okay, I'm a little ashamed, but whatever. I like when people compliment me on my outfit. I like when my husband sees me and tells me I look cute. It makes me feel normal and less of a freak. Yes, yes, I know I'm not a freak. Pregnancy is a beautiful thing and I love my baby girl. Buuuut, my body is a little wonky right now and I don't have any wonky friends and I am the only wonky woman at work. I stick out - literally.

Finding clothes that don't make me look and feel frumpy has been challenging. Picking out an outfit in the morning is getting harder and harder. I can't wear a good 80% of my clothes anymore. Pants are too tight and shirts are too short. Bras are too small (yay!) and underwear are too constricting (boo). I've cleared out all of the clothes from my wardrobe that no longer fit me (two gigantic trash bags so far), which makes it a little easier, but it's far from being easy. I really need to be comfortable, which means I wear leggings most days of the week. I miss wearing jeans! Jeans are so easy and versatile! Leggings are comfy, yes, but they are also kind of boring and they pose an interesting additional challenge - finding shirts long enough to cover my bum.

Now this may comes as a shock to most people who know me, but I'm tired of shopping for clothes. Sad, but true. Shopping isn't much fun lately, it's more like a chore that I put off doing until the last minute. It's like shopping for an outfit that you need for a wedding that's a week away. You don't have a choice - you need to find something and fast. And what you end up buying isn't usually that great. But, I must admit, because shopping isn't as easy as it used to be, I feel that much more triumphant when I find something great to buy. Like that cute summery cardigan I found at H&M or that cool shirt I got at Urban Outfitters. Next challenge: a nice pair of shorts...but that can wait.

By the way, in the time it took to write this post, Chico vomited five times. True story.

Nice tumbling pass, Sunny!

I think Sunny has taken up gymnastics. Yesterday morning I was slowly waking up when - floop! And then ten seconds later...floop! Both times it took my breath away. Since then she's been a very active little booter. I've been trying to think of how to accurately describe what it feels like and this is what I've come up with - it feels like there's a trout swimming around inside me. These aren't subtle movements anymore. According to my baby books, she's as long as an ear of corn and weighs about a pound a half. That's a long, skinny baby - no wonder it feels like a trout...

Now I'm even more curious about what she's doing. Has she taken up gymnastics? Is she practicing her floor routine? Or maybe she's into martial arts? She was so active last night that I had a hard time falling asleep. I was so fascinated, all I wanted to do was watch my belly move. This morning Brandon felt three big kicks in a row, which made me very happy. I know I say this a lot, but this whole pregnancy thing truly is amazing and I love when I can share it with my husband. There's a happy little baby growing in there! OUR happy little baby! Oh, I am just so excited to meet her.